Woot! Thanks for liking my stories of Pa yesterday! Actually as much as my father is cool, he was also a very strict father. We are very similar in our temperaments and behavior, thus we do have lots of heated arguments too. But our arguments were never unresolved and when we cool down, we will talk to one another again as if nothing happened wtf.
My father will always say when I grow up, I will slowly understand his intentions but believe me when I was growing up, I never understood his intentions until much later... Why? Because my father believes in tough love.
For someone who works super hard, obviously nonsense were rarely tolerated. Growing up, Pa showered us with lots of love but also a fair share of tough love. Like on the surface, he makes you suffer but actually beneath the surface it was for a good cause.
"Nothing Comes Free without Hardwork!"
I used to be a lazy kid. For some strange reasons, I always end up getting 7th place in class. Things change the year my brother entered standard 1, I was in standard 5. Dude got 1st place in class boohoo! That semester break, my father took us to the mall...
He told my brother he is free to buy whatever he wants. Woahhh I also felt so syiok lah and patiently waited for my father to ask me! But he never did! In the end I got impatient and asked him myself! He said why should I get anything when my result was nothing to be proud of? #HeartShatters
FML but from then onwards I studied harder and always got into the top 3 placing! When I scored straight As for my UPSR, my father got me a watch hehe. But really, this was one of the most unforgettable lessons that made me buck up in my studies... "No Excuses!"
So I was from the Science stream. Dunno why I ended up studying Business and had to take up Accounts as a subject. I seriously hated it and I think I have not been able to balance a single sheet ever! Once, right before my exams, I told my father I might fail Accounts cos you know lah never study Accounts before in secondary school ma, it's a tough feat lor...
Instead of being sympathetic my father told me, if I fail, I might as well pack my school bags and kiss college goodbye cos he is not gonna waste money on someone who doesn't appreciate the opportunity. I can go and be a sales girl at the mall or go be a fish monger wtf! Woahhh scared die me, I went and did super lots of exercises on Accounts! Tho I wasn't very good at it at least I passed hehehe!
"When There's A Will, There's A Way!"
When I was 21yo, my father asked me to settle a house transfer case gone wrong. To cut long story short, we trusted our relative who took my father's money under the pretext of investing in a property. But the fella went and bought the house under his own name. In the end he could not afford to keep the house so my father bought over his share. Problem is, my father's name was never on the deed.
He basically just gave me the lawyer's contact and told me to settle it. No if no but. Time to show him if my years of education was worthwhile. I remembered waking up in the middle of the night in cold sweat cos the progress of the transfer was super duper slow! Each time my father asked me for a report, I piss in my pants a little. By the end of the transfer, I have known the inside out of buying and transferring properties hahaha! Actually it was pretty simple just need to follow up like mad.
"Conquer Your Fear(s)!"
So my father sent me for a driving test. I passed 50/50 for the written test. Came practical test, I passed also la but I was a clumsy driver. Begged my father to buy me an auto car instead of a manual one but he said once you know how to drive a manual car, you will be able to drive just about any cars! So manual it was!
When I first got my car, I was clumsy as hell lor and my father would call me every morning to ask me if I have reached office! He would time the call nicely and would often call when I am having my breakfast! After several months ok maybe a year, my driving skills finally improved!
"Perseverance!"
My first job was with a public listed company. With over 3k employees, obviously competition was tough and office politics aplenty. So many times I tried to convince my father that quitting is the best option for me. But each time, it will end up with door slamming and lots of sulking (on my part haha).
Thing is, fierce competition and office politics are everywhere. If I give up so quickly, when I encounter the same thing again in my next job, will I run away again? How many times can I run away? Besides my father said it is always better to leave on a high note than leave admitting defeat. So I persevered on and achieved one of the highest awards in the company.
When a job offer landed on my lap, my father said I am free to decide myself for I have matured & gathered sufficient skills to try out new horizons. As much as I hate to admit, my father was right. Whatever that I learnt was really mine to keep forever. Leaving on a high note definitely was a great thing considering I was asked to go back twice.
"Thank You Pa!"
Now that I am a mommy myself, I realized how hard it must have been to let go of the need to protect and shield our children for as long as we could. At some point, children needs to be coerced to explore themselves and be exposed to the cause and effects of their actions. Nothing great ever comes nicely prepared on a silver platter. Personally, I feel that there isn't right or wrong parenting methods. As much as I protested to some of his methods, they all worked to my advantage years later.
So for that, I will always be eternally grateful to my father for pushing my boundaries and always supporting me when I needed advise, guidance and help. #CookiesJar