Stories of My Pa (I)

My father came from a small town in Negeri Sembilan. At a young age, he was chased out of home by his stepmom and came to KL with only 20 bucks. Believe it or not, rags to riches is really possible. My father became his own boss in his early twenties and had never looked back since. Had it not been for a heart condition, I am certain he would be working till 99yo not because he needed the money but because he cannot stand being idle. Throughout the years, my father taught me many important lessons in life. Many of which became my personal barometer in life too.

"Preparation comes from Working Hard. There is no Shortcut!"

My father always say; opportunities are only opportunities to those who are prepared. Don't be afraid of working hard and don't just think about shortcuts! Step by step, slowly but surely. He obviously worked very hard and grabbed every single opportunity by the horn despite numerous set backs encountered.

When I was a junior, I had this senior who always took credit for my work. Whatever analysis that was required, he would ask me to send them to him and he in turn would send them out to the bosses; conveniently omitting my name from the list. His reason was that he needed to 'check' my work although the same analysis were circulated with no additional add ons.

I spent countless hours crying to my father but he told me to persevere cos whatever skills that I learn would be mine to keep forever. Eventually when opportunities come, I would be more than adequate to grab hold of them. True enough there was a restructure and they were closing down our department. Other departments were asked to absorb the headcounts and I was one of those who were hand picked to join a top team. The rest were then thrown around the organization; my senior included.

"Be Filial & Responsible"

My father was chased out of home by his stepmom and his relationship with my grandfather wasn't exactly great. When my grandfather suffered a stroke, he needed someone to care for him. At that point, he was already separated with my step grandmother. My father has 7 siblings altogether but nobody wanted to take on the responsibility, everyone was more for putting my grandfather in the old folks home altho my grandfather made it clear that he doesn't want to...

I saw with my own eyes how everyone conveniently gave tonnes of excuses as to why their homes were not suitable although they have more than enough rooms at home. In the end, it was my father and my mommy who cared for my grandfather till his very last breath. At the end of my grandfather's journey, he finally acknowledged that of all his kids, although my father was hot tempered, he was the most filial one and also the most successful one despite not taking his money.

Even when my step grandmother was admitted to the old folks home, it was my father who paid for her monthly expenses. Personally I think it takes a big heart to forgive someone who chased you out of home so early in life and to repay with such kindness when the own son migrated to another country quickly.

"Protect My Pride & Dignity"

My father always tells us that no matter how dire the situation, try not to borrow money from anyone. Debt can be repaid but gratitude debt remains a lifetime. For someone who came to KL with only 20 bucks, one can only imagine the kind of hardship he has to go thru. And yet he never once took any money from anyone. If anything, I really respect my father for his perseverance for if not for him, we would not be able to live comfortably or even be educated to get a head start in life.

When I first started working, my father got me a car with a substantial down payment. But he also made sure I have the responsibility of paying for my own car with 1/3 of my salary for 3 years. He could have opted for 7 years or 9 years loan for me or heck buy off the whole car for me but nope, I needed to learn the value of money myself.

Needless to say as a young adult, the temptation to shop, to party and to enjoy new found freedom was aplenty. I was always strapped for cash. Once 3 days before CNY, when everyone else was done with their CNY shopping except me, my father gave me RM1K in cash to shop for myself. I remembered crying on the spot for I felt so ashamed that as a working adult I still had to take money from my father.

From then on, I vowed to better manage my own finances and not be a disgrace to my father. From a miserable 50 bucks a month for my parents each, the amount has grown many many folds today. Every single Ringgit I gave my father used to be wrapped together in a rubber band in his safe. It was not the amount he said, it's the thought.

I guess that is why I always spoil my parents with gifts and holidays on top of what I give them monthly for I am certain that my father is proud that I am able to stand on my own two feet and that I can hands in heart say that I've never taken money from anyone else; well except the RM1K la hahaha.

"Happy Father's Day Pa!"

Happy Father's Day Pa!!! Thank you for all the guidance and advise all these years! Without you, I will not even be half of who I am today. Actually till today I go to my father for advise whenever I am in a dilemma hehe. I lup you Pa!!!

P.S. Gonna ask @nainai to share this with my father and see if his words of wisdom are accurately represented hahaha!