First thing first, learn the signs of identifying one of course...
He's so compatible with me
A player has many ways of attracting his "target". More often than not, it is via the best buds route. Like how he's always attentive to what you've got to say... How he makes you laugh... How he talks about his dreams... How he seems to be on the same wavelength as you are etc etc...
He has a demanding gf
You think he's ok cos he's attached but noooooo, he tells you all his sob stories about how ridiculously demanding his gf is and how insane she's driving him that eventually you can't help but feel sorry for him...
He's always there for me
Whatever happens, he can and will be there for you... Especially when your bf is far away... Makes you wonder if your bf really cares for you...
and the list goes on...
But notice this... a player will not make any moves on you.
You will be lured to make all the moves...
(Think cos it makes it easier for them to ditch you later on)
And once the prized possession is obtained...
Sayonara honey!
I supposed that's how flings develop. Demand vs. Supply.
So to all gals out there who has second thoughts bout their bfs simply because their bfs are busy and out of the blue appeared a potential "soulmate" - think TWICE and think TRIPLY hard. It may not be worth all the hassle later on.
Take the following scenarios (happened to real friends' friends' friends):
Story 1: Tiga sekawan
- basically a couple and another guy...
- all 3 are friends...
- but somehow, the gal became soooooooooo in lurve with the new guy...
- wanted to and was sooo ready to break up with the bf....
- the gal and the new guy had so much fun together...
- the new guy is understanding...
- always there for her when she needed him...
- especially when her own bf are overseas or outstation...
- they even went on trips together where she basically cheated on her bf...
- when the gal was close to ditching her own bf...
- the new guy told her... that it's not worth spoiling such beautiful friendship...
- especially when all 3 are friends...
- so... sadly, the gal went back to her bf...
- eventually they got married and friends were invited to their wedding...
- the new guy included...
- but of course... when a person is guilty... she can't hold it to herself...
- a bunch of friends knew...
- and saw the 3 of them in a different light...
- a "secret" tat only the husband didn't know...
- in the end, they were happily married
- and the three of them?
- they were all still friends...
Story 2: If it's meant to be, it's meant to be...
- same old shit...
- air stewardess...
- a gal who wanted only 2 things to be contended...
- money & love...
- she had enuf of her own money...
- but she needed more love...
- her bf was always not around when she needed him...
- so eventually she started to have flings...
- not one guy, not two guys...
- in the end... she felt that she's no longer worthy for the bf...
- so she told him the truth and was prepared to be ditched...
- after a really shitty cool off period...
- the guy accepted the gf back...
- and they juz got married this year...
Story 3: If it ain't meant to be, it ain't meant to be...
- same old shit again....
- the only difference in this story is that...
- the gal chose the new guy instead of goin back to the old bf...
- but the old bf being silly and all... risk his own life... and went riding crazily...
- and ended up with a broken leg....
- the gal had to go back to him... to take care of him and all...
- 2 years later...
- they broke off again...
- and now, the gal is married to someone else...
- not the 1st guy nor 2nd guy... but someone totally new...
So the moral of the story is... We need to know how to spot a player from milesss away for these players are so skilled and experienced that they could toy with your emotions as easily as A-B-C. No matter what happens, relationship needs to be treated as work... If it starts getting stale, you'll need to spice it up... Humans tend to take things for granted and thus all the stupid mistakes in between...
P.S. In case you're wondering... NOOOOO, I didn't ditch my bf for someone new and NOOOOO, I wasn't having any flings with anyone and NOOOOO, I'm not two-timing my bf. This post is merely a reflection of my conversation with an e-buddy whom I have known for 10 years. :)
3 comments:
hmm..not bad..nice entry..
and for the story 3..it's stupid to go as far as a broken leg..it's just stupid..
just get on with the life and get to know new babes.. :D
How to spot a player. The girls seem more like players in these cases. They play with their lives, fate, their bf's fate and also feelings. I felt these guys really ain't that bright not to realise the girl is USING him. I mean it's true and not wrong for a girl to look for what's best for herself, but isn't it being too selfish to play around like this?
Love is trust.
I believe if we trust our partner, he will do his best to fulfill what we want. Mr. Right is named when we have total trust in our partner. Our trust is the best motivation he'll ever get. And with this motivation he will achieve the life we dreamed for. Isn't it unfair to put all the responsibilities on him yet his partner wander around to find a better him? What has his gf done for her part? Relationships are 2-sided, everyone needs to contribute. The best thing a gf can do is..TRUST.
Whether the other guy is a player or not, is not an issue. The issue lies on how the girl see love and relationship. If lust and red hot romance are her main concern, sorry..down-to-earth guys can gulung tikar. She needs to learn her lesson hard and painful before she can make up her mind.
P/s - I've seen many many examples of these relationships nowadays. Either the quality of guys dropped or the expectation of girls increased. Sigh...
Wow! Well said and so very true. All of them. Relationship should be built with contributions from both parties. If it's one sided, chances are pretty high that it won't work for long.
Sadly though, it's not only the guys who main kayu tiga nowadays. It'll be shocking to find that girls are actually the ones who are quite pro in two timing and flirting around. Talk about players... ;_;
I mean, how many of them really stopped and pondered about her own contribution towards her own relationship? And some guys should wake up from their endless dreams too. Don't take things for granted. The signs are sometimes, super obvious...
By the way, that's one heck of an interesting thing to write about! =D
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